Asanka Moehring and her family are at the forefront of creating a more inclusive culture for neurodiverse children and their families. The December issue explores the steps Asanka has taken to advance the cause in Westwood through both education and recreation.
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By Tom Leyden
Photos By: Rick Bern Photography
The Moehring home, naturally, is a welcoming spot. As we step through the front door, our Westwood Living production team is greeted by three generations and almost instantly, you can sense the role each person plays in the family dynamic.
Nalinee Dewaraja is a hands-on grandmother, heavily involved with day-to-day operations. In this moment, she has her arms protectively wrapped over the shoulders of her eight-year-old grandson, Lee, reminding him to say hello and shake hands. There is a pure connection and comfort between the two.
Marquis Moehring enters the foyer, calmly introducing himself with confidence. It's immediately evident by his controlled, confident nature Marquis is intelligent and that assumption is proven in short order as we learn he's a vice president at Liberty Mutual Insurance, and an actuary – an analyst of risk and uncertainty by trade.
Seconds later, six-year-old Lily prances down the front stairs, her hair styled beautifully with a pink barrette as she wears a floral dress - ready for the big photo shoot.
Questions. There are many questions. What are you holding? Can I see that camera? Can I look through the lens? Why are you taking our picture? Who's going to see this picture? Why do you print a magazine? Who sees the magazine? Will I see the magazine? When are we having our picture taken?
"Lee was diagnosed to be on the autism spectrum when we were living in Natick,” said Asanka Moehring, the driving force in this family unit, an energetic and engaging professional who earned her master’s and PhD degrees in Bioengineering from the University of Washington in Seattle.
"We settled in Natick because the Grants, the one family we knew in Massachusetts, lived there," said Asanka. "Sadly, it was a struggle to get Lee the services he needed at the Natick integrated preschool."
The move to Natick was short-lived once the Moehrings realized the Westwood school system would be a much better match for their needs.
In the years since, the Moehrings have set down roots within earshot of Sheehan Elementary's playground, engaging in meaningful community service and positively affecting the special needs programs within the school system and beyond. While Lee and Lily both benefit from a program that's been cultivated over time, they also benefit from the focused dedication of their mother, who wants nothing more than to make things better for Westwood's neurodiverse community.
Asanka was born in Sri Lanka and lived there until the Dewaraja family moved to Australia in 1996. Her father, Anura Dewaraja, who still spends a great deal of time in Sri Lanka, is a retired science teacher who continues to teach his grandkids both in-person and on Zoom.
“Lee and Lily love doing science with my dad," said Asanka. “This summer they made rock candy and grew butterflies. He even taught Lily how to read Sinhala, our native tongue. The summer before that I helped facilitate a series of zoom sessions where he taught them about force and motion using a combination of readings and hands-on activities."
Education has always been the top priority in the Dewaraja household.
The Dewaraja’s journey around the globe has been fascinating. After nearly three years in Melbourne, the family moved to Washington in 1999 and spent almost two decades in Seattle, where Asanka’s beloved uncle, Neil, has lived for nearly 30 years. Asanka met Marquis while attending Highland Community College, before she transferred to the University of Washington. Over the course of many years, Asanka earned her PhD and ultimately married Marquis.
In 2018, Marquis assumed a new responsibility at Liberty Mutual’s home office in the Boston area, necessitating another major move, this time with two young children in tow.
"We traveled east to scope out the best schools in Boston with Marquis' mom, Karin, and we spent about two weeks in an Airbnb in Brookline," said Asanka. "It was just really, really busy and Lee would just take off every time he saw a firetruck, a bus or a garbage truck. At this point, we didn’t know he was autistic, and I just didn't feel I could keep him safe - and Lily was only two at the time."
"We were working with Dr. Alexis Kovacs, a psychologist who diagnosed Lee with ADHD," said Asanka. "She hinted that Lee would be a great match for the STAR program at Sheehan. I wanted Lily to go to the same school and I didn't want to have to apply for it every year, so I wanted their 'home' school to be Sheehan. We sort of restricted ourselves to the Sheehan district, and it took us over nine months to find our forever home in Westwood."
Rearing two neurodiverse children has changed both Asanka and Marquis, for the better.
"It forces me to be more patient and thoughtful," said Marquis. "There are all these patterns I expected to be part of parenting and those are not available. I don't know a better way to describe it. It makes you more patient and It forces you to be more thoughtful. I mean, you could choose to not be, but it doesn't make anything any better."
Once the Moehrings were settled in Westwood, Asanka entrenched herself in SEPAC. The Special Education Parental Advisory Council works closely with school district administrators, consistently fine-tuning the offerings made available to students and enhancing daily life through education and inclusion. Asanka also volunteers with the Sheehan PTA and helped organize Sheehan’s inaugural Cultural festival.
Outside of the classroom, Asanka has been instrumental in fostering a partnership with the Westwood Recreation Department to offer inclusive community programs designed with the neurodiverse community in mind. This effort is both rewarding and time-consuming for everyone involved - a massive team effort.
Richard Adams, the Westwood Recreation Director, along with his entire staff, has taken great strides, hand-in-hand with Asanka, to offer new inclusive recreation programming. There are many challenges associated with the effort, most notably the challenge of training, managing and funding the extra staff necessary to effectively roll-out inclusive programs.
"At the beginning of 2021, Asanka approached the Recreation Department with the idea of developing recreational programming designed to be inclusive of neurodiverse children," said Richard. "Asanka explained that this type of programming does not currently exist in Westwood. As a result, she and other parents typically drive out to surrounding communities, often paying very high fees just so their neurodiverse children can attend recreational programs offered by private companies."
"I wanted to help create inclusive, affordable community programming in Westwood," said Asanka. "I took the concept to the Recreation Department and the entire team was immediately on board, with Rich telling me he had always wanted to offer inclusive programming. Lucky for us, Westwood has The Foundation for Westwood Education – such a great organization. We hoped they could help and I spent a lot of time brainstorming with my good friend, Megan Brenk, during our morning walks. At the same time, I spent many hours working with Principal Evans and Jessica Drohan, our Board Certified Behavioral Analyst, to develop the framework for a pilot study."
"Asanka Moehring embodies the true meaning of inclusivity," said Kristen Evans, the principal at Sheehan Elementary. "Her energy and positive approach to ensuring all families feel welcomed and a sense of belonging in our school community is above all."
"Asanka is the kind of person that creates connections everywhere she goes," said Drohan.
"Her passion to help bring families together in the Westwood community has been the driving force of the inclusive projects. It's exciting to see her vision come to life and create much-needed inclusive and accessible options for Westwood."
Sue Kagan, a dear friend of Asanka’s and a lifetime advocate for inclusive community programming, helped write the grant request to the Foundation for Westwood Education, a plea that successfully led to the funding of a pilot program and the team of behavioral experts that were hired to help run it.
"The two primary goals of developing this series of programs, which we dubbed iSTEAM, was for it to be local and more affordable for Westwood families than what’s already out there," said Adams.
"Naturally, we saw the benefits to offering such programming and I promptly began working with Asanka to learn more about neurodiversity, her ideas and identifying requirements and hurdles we had to overcome to make this programming possible. Asanka brought her expertise and vast number of contacts to the table. She also helped us obtain a grant from the Foundation for Westwood Education to fund our pilot program and the team of behavioral experts that we hired to help run it."
"In recreation programs, the main focus is 'play,' so we wanted something that was just 'play' and would get kids together, and have them play together," said Asanka.
In January 2022, the first program designed with inclusivity in mind was launched. The program was called "Friends Connect," and aimed to bring neurodiverse and neurotypical peers together to build LEGOs.
"We ran back-to-back playgroups for two age groups," said Asanka. "One was for kids six to eight-years-old, the other was for kids eight to ten-years-old and we received so much interest, we ended up running a lottery to select sixteen kids in total, four neurodiverse and four neurotypical kids for each group."
The STEM-based LEGO program was held across six Wednesday afternoons at Wentworth Hall in Islington. Primarily for health and safety reasons, parents did not accompany their children into the room, which initially presented some challenges for the staff as they got to know each individual.
"A lot of times, with neurodiverse kids, they need some freeing," said Asanka. "You have to tell them exactly what's going to happen because they have a lot of anxiety around things that are different - any kind of transition."
The children were teamed up, one neurodiverse and one neurotypical, with a friendship guide who completed the specialized training also included. The main focus of the exercise was self-advocacy and problem solving, with a belief that if children mastered those two skills, they could form relationships with each other more easily.
"The whole idea was they had to talk to each other," said Asanka. "One was the engineer and one was the builder. Before we began they completed a 'Buddy Sheet," that detailed what they liked and didn't like. 'If you come too close to me, that makes me feel uncomfortable,' - things like that. So each buddy knew a little bit about the other before they began the project. A large part of this is teaching neurotypical children how best to interact with and communicate with neurodiverse children. Inevitably, that enhances their problem solving and self-advocacy skills."
The Westwood Recreation department immediately integrated many of the success from the pilot program to enhance the 2022 summer camps, which hosted approximately 250 children every week, a combination of neurodiverse and neurotypical. Gillian Nolan, a dedicated employee of the Westwood school district who is pursuing her masters in Special Education at Lesley College, was added to the staff at Westwood recreation as a behavioral specialist and proved to be incredibly valuable. The process is evolutionary. Not every step is simple. Each bend in the road presents a new challenge, but these are positive steps forward.
With the successful completion of the pilot programs, lessons were learned and it was clear a focus on training and development is a key to long-term success. Staffing an inclusive program is much more challenging than staffing a typical recreation program. Hours of training and unique skill sets are involved, and more instructors are needed.
With that in mind, Asanka once again helped secure funding from The Foundation for Westwood Education to further develop the initiative.
"In Phase 2, we will be designing a comprehensive in-house training program to develop the specialized skills staff members need to work in inclusive programming," said Rich. "It is our goal to offer the first training program in the first half of 2023."
"Rich is interested in making sure this can be done sustainably year after year," said Asanka. "The Recreation Department regularly uses high schoolers as camp counselors all summer long. So we think if we come up with a volunteer program where we take in high schoolers and also college kids from around town, we can support them with our professional team already in place. We figure about 40 hours of training is plenty, with most of it being on-the-job training and the rest of it being workshops and informational sessions."
While Asanka juggles her professional responsibilities which includes coast-to-coast travel, as a Research and Development Engineer at Westwood Doppler, her passion for inclusivity and advocacy and her commitment to her family, she freely admits it's her mother, Nalinee, who keeps the Moehring crew connected and operating smoothly on a daily basis.
"She feeds us, and I don't mean peanut butter and jelly," said Asanka. "She prepares chef quality food, you know? She puts out healthy, three course meals every day for us - breakfast, lunch and dinner. She helps with the kids, pretty much everything. Laundry, getting the house cleared up. Marquis works full-time upstairs and I'm working, so having her here is such a blessing and we're fortunate."
"Oh, I'm happy to do those things for my grandchildren, helping all the time because Asanka's otherwise struggling and they don't get a proper meal," said Nalinee. "So I help her as she runs her life - doing the housework and all these things."
The most beautiful aspect of the dynamic is Nalinee's undying love for her family. She does not see her grandchildren as "different." They are from her blood, and they are a gift. It's clear she views her role in the day-to-day as a privilege.
“My parents unconditional support for my many pursuits is my ace in the hole. They have always encouraged me to do what's necessary and supported me every step of the way, sacrificing without complaint or regret. I strive to follow in their footsteps and do the same for my children” said Asanka.
What's next and how can you become involved? The first step is engagement. Like Lee and Lily, ask tons of questions. Contact Asanka and see how you might be a fit moving forward. It takes a village.
"Our professional staffers have all told me that when they were going through school, opportunities where they got to work with kids were rare but important to their personal and professional development," said Asanka. "So, we figure if we use our team of behavior specialists to develop and execute a training program, we can reach out to schools and say, 'Hey, would your students like to gain experience working in inclusive recreational programming? Would you advertise for us? A lot of time high schoolers and even undergraduates are reluctant to work as staff in inclusive programs because they don't know what to expect or how to work with neurodiverse individuals. But if there is professional staff willing and able to mentor them throughout the process, we eliminate that hesitation. This way the staff can have a positive experience and so can the children. We're on the right track, but we've really just begun."
With a leader like Asanka at the helm, the journey is worth the commitment.
You can contact Asanka Moehring at asanka.dewaraja@icloud.com or by calling (206) 979 5606. For more information on the Special Education Parents Advisory Council (SEPAC), visit westwoodsepac.org
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By Tom Leyden
"It's mayhem, but it's good. It runs smoothly."
Maria Tassiopoulos couldn't have described the scene on a busy night at Islington Pizza any better.
The phone rings off the hook. A line of customers stretches back from the counter. Delivery drivers come in and out the side door every few minutes. You see and hear the non-stop activity in the kitchen as orders are called, pizzas get moved around the oven, sandwiches are crafted, salads are tossed and jokes are cracked.
"It's an organized hustle," said Maria. "Everybody has their station. Everybody's been doing it forever, so it's almost like you can sense the people walking around you, leaning back, reaching, it's just crazy. People are swerving and ducking and just missing each other. It's what we do."
Islington Pizza is everything Maria always wanted it to be - a neighborhood staple that's now served the Westwood community for more than a quarter century. As we sit tucked in a booth, with a fresh coat of paint being applied to the walls, we chat about the growth and evolution of her family-owned business.
"Our first day of business here was December 26th, 1995," said Maria. "I was considerably younger. My father used to own the spot where the current Dunkin Donuts is on Washington St. It was called The Coffee Grinder. My dad, mom, brother and I worked there full-time for three years and at that point we just wanted to be done. We both went to college and wanted to do something else. So my dad ended up putting it up for sale and Dunks bought it in October of 1994."
To Demetrios Tassiopoulos, Maria's dad, the appeal of operating his own restaurant was too strong. He was back in the game after 13 months and the day after Christmas in 1995, Islington Pizza welcomed its first customers. Maria and her brother, Evan, were on board. Perhaps a little known fact, the pies made at Islington Pizza today are the same pies made at The Coffee Grinder back in the day.
"It's been the same pizza forever," said Maria.
That secret recipe has attracted customers from Westwood and beyond as they travel Route 1A, and while "Pizza" is in the name, there's more to Islington Pizza than dough, cheese and tomato sauce.
"Our food is extremely consistent," said Maria. "We pound and bread our own fresh chicken breasts for chicken cutlets with our own bread crumbs and our own secret-spice recipe that goes in the bread crumbs. We haven't changed it in over 20 years and I wouldn't change it. Even if I found something that I thought was better, I wouldn't change it because people love it.
They say we have the best chicken parm around. And a hidden gem is the Sweet Asian chili sauce. We just introduced that within the last year. So you can get a Sweet Asian Chili Finger dinner or Sweet Asian Wings. It sounds exactly how it is - sweet and spicy sauce instead of a buffalo sauce. Not many people know about that yet, but when they do..."
Her tone suggests "Watch Out!"
In the nearly 27 years since Islington Pizza opened, a lot has transpired in the Tassiopoulos family. Dad still pops by occasionally, but it's Maria who runs the operation in Islington. Evan opened Pizzadoros on River Street in Dedham and her husband, Rob, owns Crisp, a pizza restaurant with locations in Walpole and Canton.
As the Tassiopoulos reach grows, the most important things remain the same, like Maria's personal touch and friendliness.
"Everybody comes in, they're like, 'Hey Maria, what's up?' I know almost everybody's name and what else can I say? It's great," said Maria. "I'm a people-person. I love to talk. I like to move. I don't like to sit down at a desk. I like to keep busy. Even on my days off, I don't lie down on the couch and watch TV."
There's no sitting down when you're surrounded by mayhem. But it's good... it runs smoothly.
Islington Pizza is located at 315 Washington Street. Stop by or call 781-326-8970. Help the staff celebrate their 27th anniversary by enjoying some delicious food.
Charlene and the Crew always greet you with a smile at Islington Pizza.
By Jay Resha
‘Twas the night before New Year, engagements all made
But first a look back, before Twenty-Two’s fade
Pondering all the things we will remember
Memories made from Jan. 1 through December
We started off ill, Omicron was to blame
The Bills crushed our Pats, a real “sick” playoff game
Russia sent troops on a peacekeeping mission
Then made attempts at Ukraine demolition
Local election time, ring full of hats,
Select Marianne was our winner – congrats!
A “Jeopardy!” season with historic winnings
But who is the better host, Mayim or Jennings?
Schedules in spring can be so unforgiving
Made time, however, to read Westwood Living!
Wolverine High set to hang a new banner
Girls Lax are state champs in dominant manner!
Basketball’s Celtics reached almost as high,
But ran into Warriors, came up just shy
Islington spotlighted – new House of Muffins,
Next to Neroli…our bellies we’re stuffins!
The summer sun blazed, rainfall nary a drop
District commands every sprinkler to stop
Cutting down Shuttleworth trees for the new school
Online debates range from civil to quite cruel
Nearby reminders of all sorts of trouble
Hospital Norwood now no more than rubble
Soon enough, yellow school buses returned
Hoping kids won’t forget all that they’d learned
Colder October makes fewer folks happy
But, did you catch all that fever o’ Zappe?
Next year a new law, we’re not sure the reason
We turned back our clocks – but for one final season
Halloween candy was ripe for some stealing
Election night better for Heal-ing than Deihl-ing
Onward we marched, for our Thanksgiving feast
To Roche Brothers, Wegmans, and Liz from High Street
Now we prepare for the year’s culmination
Regardless of everyone’s creed observation
Gather together once more, we are bound
This is where faith, hope and love can be found
Houses of worship with no empty seats
Children now dreaming of presents and treats
Into the final week, planning a great night
Dieting plans are on hold for the week, right?
Some will go meet at a fine Westwood place
Handshakes and hugs and a smile on your face
Outstanding food, hometown restaurants do yield
(Bistros here maybe are better’n Medfield?)
Many invited to houses instead
Stay up till midnight? Or just go to bed?
Packed in their mini-vans, quick as they could
And headed to neighborhoods all over the ‘Wood:
Cloverland, High Ridge, the Loop, Maze and Weatherbee
Cedar Hills, Fox Meadow, Stevens Farms and Birch Tree!
Can’t be late – party’s the last one of this year
Wishing your car had a shiny red nose, dear!
Up Oxford and Windsor, down High Street they came
To a Valley so Pleasant, and then down Farm Lane
Sycamore, Oak, Spruce, Magnolia and Sumac
Margery Lane by a Road we call Tamarack
On Strasser, on Far Reach, on Washington too
On Pond Street and Church, even Card Avenue
From North Street to East Street - O my, what a sprinter!
To Summer, to Autumn, by all means to Winter!
So don’t be a Grinch, spread some holiday cheer
Merry Merry to all, and I’ll see you next year!
Westwood Living? No…thank YOU for living in Westwood. See you next month, and I look forward to hearing from you any time at jayresha@comcast.net
By Sangha Mitra
On November 12, The Westwood South Asian Association hosted its annual Diwali Festival at Westwood High School. The event returned after a two-year hiatus owing to the pandemic. Diwali, a festival of lights, signifies the triumph of good over evil and is widely celebrated around the world by 500-600 million people. Typically, the celebration includes fireworks, lights, dancing, music, arts, and food. Westwood's event was no exception and highlighted many facets of the festivities to the Westwood Community.
The response to the celebrations was spectacular. Almost 250 guests attended the event eager to enjoy the festivities. Some came early to partake in traditional clothes try-on and wear popular items like saree for the evening. In the cafeteria, Thurston Middle School Dean of Students, Edward Walker, performed the ceremonial lighting of the Diya to start the celebrations, followed by music, dance and drama by elementary and middle school children, and speeches by graduating seniors.
The evening showcased many aspects of South Asian culture including elaborate decorations, an art exhibition, children's crafts, henna, and lessons in a folk dance, Dandiya, which featured guests dancing with colorful sticks. The evening also included a sumptuous Indian meal and a lively DJ music that got the guests dancing to energetic Bollywood music.
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